What to do with my life???

After quite a handful of interviews and an extended period of unemployment, I wonder what I exactly do I want to do with my life. I am not getting any younger and my skills are pretty limited. Do I really have a choice? I need a clearer picture of what I really want to do with my life which is fulfilling and meaningful; hence the questions as follow:

• What am I passionate about? I love teaching, making an impact on my students. I love writing, words are my tools of creativity and communication. I love telling stories, as I believe this is the best way to get my messages across. I love art and craft, be it a hobby or teaching others in workshops. I love reading; books are the only thing that I refuse to go without. I love spending time in vast landscape. 
• What are my greatest accomplishments in life so far? I am proud of my academic achievement, my 12 years of teaching, my organization abilities, my thirst of knowledge, and learning to build my website from scratch and my blogs and newsletters. I am proud of my travel experiences which never failed to surprise myself.
• If my life had absolutely no limits, what would I choose to have and to do? I wouldn't be stuck in Hong Kong merely existing. I would spend my life living in different countries of my choice, living in a caravan or a boathouse, volunteering for causes which speak to me, writing novels in seclusion, having my own business with my own brand, learning felting and other creative hobbies in person from the best crafters, husky-sledding in Alaska, and basically living in the wild.
• What are my goals in life? I don't really believe in setting goals as they tend to change as I evolve. Nothing is set in stone and I like to have the freedom and flexibility to change courses. I suppose I am here to experience life and live one day at a time so goals are not quite my thing. Put it this way, I'd like to see my existence leaves a mark on earth and makes an impact on those I cross path with; knowing that I won't be forgotten when my body falls apart.
• Whom do I admire most in the world? I read quite a lot of (auto)/biographies and there are a few I wish to pay my tribute: Vincent Van Gogh, Coco Chanel, Neale Walsch, Eileen Caddy, Henry Thoreau, Cath Kidston, Edith Piaf, and many more. Each has his/ her unique characters and qualities which deserve much acknowledgement and respect.
• What do I not like to do? I can't stand bureaucracy and authorities. I don't follow rules. I am not carved out to be a cubicle worker with strict working hours. I hate administrative work, and I despise office politics.
• How hard am I willing to work to get what I want? I must admit that there are parts that I am putting in a lot of effort and parts which I seem to procrastinate. I am persistent in job hunting, upgrading myself with new skills and knowledge but I am still not doing enough to get to where I want to be. So instead of waiting for Jan 1, I intend to take one little simple step one day at a time and mark my progress. Enjoying the process is probably more important than reaching the destination which for me, is forever changing!

On HABITS...

Aren't we all creatures of habits? Most of the time we are not even aware of their presence, let alone kicking the bad ones. Do we really know ourselves? For change to take place, we must learn about ourselves and our habits before taking any action. Becoming aware of their existence is the first step. For someone who feels confident enough, going cold turkey is the way to do it. For others, the tier method could just be as effective. Self-control requires practice and it takes some time to ween off a certain unwanted habit. To make the process easier, a replacement might be exactly what you need; from starting a hobby to chewing gums, as you consciously choose to be the person you want to be. Creating the right environment / mindset is the second step, and be consistent in your daily actions. The brain takes a minimum of 21 consecutive days of actions to make synapse connection so be patient with yourself. I like to read something light before bed and the action of reading is registered and tied to my sleep pattern. By leveraging actions to create habits, it makes the task less intimidating than if you try it from scratch. 

Here are some of the 'bad habits' I wish to discard in the new year:

• procrastination
• spending money on things I don't need
• perfectionism and self-doubt
• dwelling on the past and worrying about the future
• judging myself and others
• confining myself in the comfort zone
• take life for granted

I am sure life could be a lot better when I get rid of my bad habits.

Music in my life...

As a writer, I spend a large part of my life in solitude. I like the peace and quiet at the wee hours when noise pollution is relatively lower and the darkness seems soothing to my senses. However, combating the noise level during the day could be tricky and being peculiar about what I allow into my auditory orifices,I use music to drown out the trash while lifting myself up with songs I love. I turn to music to make myself feel better. 

There is this song that played at a pivotal moment in my life and I am instantly transported back to that time and place the minute it plays. There are times when my all-time favourite songs spontaneously came over the radio and I burst out singing along with abandon. There are days when reading seems too much for my peeps and my headphone seems more appealing. Checking out albums at my local HMV is one of my past-times too; second to bookshops. 

There are plenty of benefits of music:

• it's a form of entertainment; I like my music in the background when I do the housework, when I wait for transport and surfing the internet
• it wakes me up in the morning and calms me down at night
• it helps to distract me from unpleasant thoughts and experiences
• it helps to discharge negative emotions when I sing along
• the lyrics can be stimulating and inspiring for my writing
• it pays my tribute to the artists who left a legacy in their music,

not to mention the health benefits it brings.

Here are some of my favourite artists whose albums I listen to often:

• Into the Wild soundtrack
• Once soundtrack
• La vie en rose soundtrack
• Francoise Hardy
• Carla Bruni
• Zaz
• Caro Emerald
• Enya
• Melanie Pain
• Lenka

I can't see my life without music!