Excess=Success???

I am not claiming myself to be a die-hard minimalist but my experience with shopping malls recently has been quite revealing; I don't bother visiting them at all, including bookshops for this matter. Now that is alarming for a booklover like me.

It's not that I can't afford to buy things as there is always a plastic card nearby but I honestly find the process of shopping and purchasing dead boring, there is just too much of everything everywhere I look, and I am not impressed by the signs for sales at all. The excess is so obvious that it is entirely possible to ignore the whole facade and walk on by. 

What is success to you could be different from my definition and it is okay. However, success can never be equivalent to excessive material possessions. To me it is a sign of lacking confidence and a disguise used to boost up status and power. To me, it is just plain old dumb to cover the real you with a veil of false glamour, made up of faked diamonds and precious stones. In a way not unlike posting on Facebook and other similar platforms where one can brag about the purchase of the latest limited edition from the Channel warehouse. 

We are living in a world of excess. We buy in the name of a better economy. Even a child can see through the lie of this vicious cycle which is doing no-one any good but detrimental to the society and the environment. Do you dream of greater accomplishments, of something greater than material excess? I personally desire significance, influence, to be able to use my gifts to make the world better, that my life matters for something. Above all, I desire freedom and opportunity, to be known and accepted for who I am. I don't ever for once equate material excess with lasting success.

Money earned through honest means and real effort deserves recognition but how can we ever know the source of someone's income which affords him/ her a penthouse and a private plane? I believe there are better things to do with our hard earned cash than spending on accumulating excess. Then there is the environmental factor we should consider before we splurge. The wealth / poverty gap is big enough to show us what greed can do to the world. Comparison with others results in envy, and contentment is something far reaching and unattainable.

I am so so tired of this world of excessive consumerism and I know that I cannot change the world by myself which explains why I am constantly attracted to simple living and the nature found in Scotland and the countryside. I crave home-made gourmet and not frozen meals, I want to buy from the farmer's market, not chain supermarket, I like to see my time well spent on things that add value to myself and others, not to take up any job for the sake of the monthly paycheck. 

I am not rich but I have enough. I see myself pretty successful because I have made a positive impact on my students. I am enough.

CHILL out!

It is 34C right now and here I am tapping away at my desk in an air conditioned room, sipping a cup of masala tea. I had lunch with a friend earlier on in one of the most crowded tourist area and went straight home without checking out the malls like I used to. Too much unwanted noise, polluted air, and ridiculous traffic, I am so pleased to be back home and chill out!

I am the kind of people who need a lot of personal space and privacy. I used to be a social butterfly and a drama queen but as I get older, I prefer minimal socialization. I can always focus on my work but I must have my downtime in between to balance out. My favourite questions to myself when I am in the midst of overreacting, getting angry and frustrated are:

• Does it really matter?
• Who cares?
• Will it matter 5 years from now? or even 5 weeks from now?

These questions help me to instantly change my mood and mind.

Meanwhile, taking breaks throughout the day really helps as far as concentration / productivity is concerned. How do you take breaks? When do you take them? For how long do you take them? Make sure you don't wait until you burn out. As a start, I reject the idea of being connected 24/7 and that's why I don't have a smartphone. I don't want to be a slave to the virtual community and I like to have my own space (physical / virtual) to work on my own meaningful stuff. 

Being a workaholic myself, I enjoy what I do so I don't suffer from bouts of burnout. I take breaks by choice but it doesn't always have to follow work. I might take a break before getting my butt at the desk revamping my webpages; depending on how I feel at the time. Take a REAL break and not one by default!

Alone or Lonely?

I was bullied at school.
I became a social butterfly at university.
I was involved with someone for 9 years.
Many lovers throughout the years.
I became alone after the breakup.
I am alone but not lonely.

I learned not to be. The hard way. And I am pretty good at that.
I am single. I hardly have any friends whom I can count on. I live with my mother and she is the only relative I have. 
I travel alone. I dine alone. I seldom ask for help if at all.
I am intolerant of endlessly socializing and constant connecting.
Having a smartphone doesn't help.
Being alone is so so empowering and  freeing.
All the more reason I need space and time spent alone.

I have learnt to trust myself and become self-sufficient. 
I hate to be dependent on others, especially in a relationship.
I am okay just as I am, without anyone to complete me; or to keep me company.
I am happy by myself.

There are plenty of things I can do alone.
I tend to work on self-initiated projects that speak to me.
I pour myself into work that I am passionate about.
I get to know more about myself in the process.

Don't we all land on this earth alone? 
We spent 9 months alone in our mothers' wombs.
We take our first breath alone.
Knowing that we are going to leave this earth alone, I am no longer be afraid of loneliness.
It simply doesn't exist.
There are so many others out there who are alone.
Think of the prisoners locked in cells.
Think of the abandoned elders without a shelter.

And we all need solitude and get real quiet.
I enjoy listening to my own heart beat.
Being alone doesn't mean I am lonely.
Being lonely doesn't mean I am alone.
I choose to be alone rather than to be in bad company.
I prefer to live and speak my truth.
I am stronger than I thought I were.

Maybe that is the very reason why I choose teaching as a career.
Nurturing others through teaching fills the emptiness.
I consider myself a loner.
That is why I like to keep my pad spotless.
That is why I am in love with the nature.
That is why I meditate.
That is why I hardly watch TV.
Nothing beats the joy of creating something of value.
I am comfortable being alone.