schedule vs deadline

It's less than 24 hours before December descends on us and instead of feeling excited about the upcoming holidays, I am feeling overwhelmed and stressed. I have set a goal to complete my first online magazine by the end of the month but learning InDesign (a software I know nothing about) is no easy feat, especially for someone who is technology-phobic. I am not happy about the delay in launching my e-mag (which is most likely going to happen) but unless I pay someone to do the design and layout, which beats the purpose of doing the e-course in the first place, I have no options but to bear with my incompetency and hence take extra time and more effort to learn the nuts and bolts. 

Maybe there is a purpose to stress; it is a way of gearing me up to meet my challenges. It helps me to achieve my goals. Rather than running from discomfort, I push myself forward if I am doing something meaningful. We are going to experience stress no matter what so it is important to do what matter, things that give our lives meaning. 

I remember digging in the manual and after over a year of hardwork, my website was born from scratch. There were sweat and tears along the way but I made it in the end because having my own website is on top of my priority list. I learned to be resourceful and overcame such a huge task which I believed to be way beyond my capability at the time. 

I do feel helpless from time to time but it is just a fleeting feeling afterall in an overwhelmed person's mind. I should have been more realistic about my own skills and set more realistic deadlines. What I have learned from this mishap is that I should be setting a schedule to operate by rather than a deadline to perform by.Picking up a new skill takes time and patience and instead of feeling like a failure, I want to focus on the practice by sticking to a schedule. Giving up is not an option as I believe my e-mag is something worthy of my time and effort. Having said that, I am giving myself a schedule to follow consistently, not a deadline to race towards.