The definition of sexiness...

I was going through my photo albums the other day and couldn't help to pick out the 'old me' of 20 odd years ago. I couldn't believe how pretty and attractive I was and looking into the mirror today makes me want to puke. How could such a stunning beauty become someone fat and ugly?

I am responsible for the way I turn out to be. I don't give a f* how I look to others, I stopped exercising because of chronic eczema, and of course aging plays a part too. However, botox is the last thing on my mind. 

To cheer myself up, I had my hair cut real short (tomboyish) yesterday and I feel good about it. Yes, it is a bold decision but I am pleased that it suits me and my personality; and it is not a style most faces can wear. My confidence returns.

Yes, it is a harsh fact that I am no longer the pretty old me but sexiness is a state of mind, a comfortable state of being. To be sexy without pouty lips and hour glass figures, I find the following character traits to be the best indicator:

1. Have your own signature style. Stand up for your values and beliefs.
2. Self-confidence is the key. Believe that you are worthy and valuable and be comfortable in your own skin.
3. Making a difference in others' lives is part of your self ID.
4. Live a life of passion and purpose.
5. Be responsible for how your life unfold.
6. Live a life of honesty. Liars are never sexy!
7. Be authentic. Accept yourself for who you are and what you like.

Our superficial culture honors the young and the thin. Supermodels are humans too and aging is something they must face up to sooner or later. Instead of focusing my time and energy on 'making' myself beautiful, I choose to go deeper and work on deepening my intelligence, expanding my wisdom, enjoy the many life experiences, and strengthen my character. This is my interpretation of 'sexiness'.

Perceptions of beauty are different all over the world and they change over time. What matters is not how you look to others but how you look at yourself. What do you think?

schedule vs deadline

It's less than 24 hours before December descends on us and instead of feeling excited about the upcoming holidays, I am feeling overwhelmed and stressed. I have set a goal to complete my first online magazine by the end of the month but learning InDesign (a software I know nothing about) is no easy feat, especially for someone who is technology-phobic. I am not happy about the delay in launching my e-mag (which is most likely going to happen) but unless I pay someone to do the design and layout, which beats the purpose of doing the e-course in the first place, I have no options but to bear with my incompetency and hence take extra time and more effort to learn the nuts and bolts. 

Maybe there is a purpose to stress; it is a way of gearing me up to meet my challenges. It helps me to achieve my goals. Rather than running from discomfort, I push myself forward if I am doing something meaningful. We are going to experience stress no matter what so it is important to do what matter, things that give our lives meaning. 

I remember digging in the manual and after over a year of hardwork, my website was born from scratch. There were sweat and tears along the way but I made it in the end because having my own website is on top of my priority list. I learned to be resourceful and overcame such a huge task which I believed to be way beyond my capability at the time. 

I do feel helpless from time to time but it is just a fleeting feeling afterall in an overwhelmed person's mind. I should have been more realistic about my own skills and set more realistic deadlines. What I have learned from this mishap is that I should be setting a schedule to operate by rather than a deadline to perform by.Picking up a new skill takes time and patience and instead of feeling like a failure, I want to focus on the practice by sticking to a schedule. Giving up is not an option as I believe my e-mag is something worthy of my time and effort. Having said that, I am giving myself a schedule to follow consistently, not a deadline to race towards.

Do Less. Be More.

The festive season is just what I need to do less and be more. Well, as I am non-religious, I don't celebrate Christmas and having only myself to account for, I am pretty free to do whatever I want when others are busy with entertaining guests, Christmas shopping, and partying. There is a long list of to-dos I wish to fulfill but I choose not to be too hard on myself this time round and take things easy. I like to be productive and I will be when I have less to think about so I can concentrate on what matter to me most, and not to be overwhelmed by all the pretty projects lining up in my planner is not easy. Anyway, I am currently learning from Jen's Create your Magazine in 4 weeks ecourse and loving it. There is so much skills and techniques to learn and a lot of planning is required to make it a successful endeavour. I'll take all the time as needed to apply the knowledge to my first magazine!

Having had a pretty laid back life in Oz, I am still having difficulties living life at a break-neck pace. I am constantly feeling overwhelmed, and yet I am adding more to my to-do list. There are work commitments which require my 200% which I am not prepared to agree to. I am feeling pulled in many different directions that I live like a zombie sometimes. It is about time to focus on what is important as opposed to what is urgent. I need to slow down by saying 'It's not a priority' instead of "I don't have time'. If I don't like how I am spending an hour, I can always choose differently. 

To work less and be productive at the same time, here are some tips you might want to check out:

• Focus. Do only what is important and what drives your business forward.
• Make a list on paper and refer back to it constantly to make sure you are on track.
• Work in wifi-free area to avoid distraction.
• Upgrade yourself by reading and taking e-courses. Use what you learn!
• Get into a rhythm and be consistent.
• Earn some passive income to save energy.
• Say NO considering the opportunity cost involved.
• Get the most stressful task out of the way by doing it first.
• Take plenty of breaks.
• Group similar tasks together and get them done in batches.

It is possible to work less and be more!