On Confidence...

I got asked many times how I could be so confident (more like looking confident or acting with confidence) but what is IT? According to the dictionary, confidence is defined as the belief in one's power or abilities. If this is the case, I certainly look the part.

My belief is personal and highly subjective, and I am independent of the opinions of others to feel 'successful' as I am aware of my ability and it takes a lot of inner strength to trust yourself. Being a writer and an artist, it takes me ages to be creatively confident, trusting the process with patience. 

To be more confident, here are the 4 major aspects to pay attention to:

• DOUBT less.You are good enough. You can do it.
• Banish ARROGANCE: you don't have all the answers!!! Don't dismiss any ideas that might conflict with what you believe is right.
• Adopt a Beginner's mindset and embrace all possibilities. When you have no expectations and no preconceived ideas but an open mind, you become receptive. 
• Do not be over-confident! And for me as a writer, I enjoy writing about what I don't know much about.

Confidence helps me progress even in the face of fear and adversity, without worrying about failure. Failure is a part of life as we live it, and I can't possibly fail when I refuse to give up. Just pick yourself up, brush the dirt off and keep going. There is always something new, a first time to something and I am adventurous enough to give it a go regardless of the outcome. 

I don't become confident overnight; it takes me years and years of failures to build up my confidence (in myself). How did I do it? 

• willing to be uncomfortable by putting yourself in situations where you are forced to overcome new and unknown obstacles
• commit to learning, adapting and growing
• accept failure 
• it is okay to be wrong as long as you learn from your mistakes
• avoid gossip at all costs and look for the best in others instead
• let go and laugh at yourself when things don't go as planned
• ignore other's opinions (who's asking for opinions anyway???)

I suppose one of the reasons that I exude confidence is that I learn to like myself, do what I enjoy doing and liking how I am doing it. I have been investing in myself since day 1, actively pursuing personal growth and subjects I find fascinating.I am constantly trying new things, developing new skills and meeting new people. I am super careful with how I spend my limited time and energy. Although my body size and shape have gone awry 15 years ago, I don't see myself inferior to super models, and I accept myself the way I am now. I truly believe that I am a person of value, and that I have much to contribute to the world before my last breath. 

When you like yourself, you can't avoid being not confident. You believe you can handle problems and overcome hurdles life throws at you. You understand person has intrinsic value and you would only look for the goodness in others. Without the need to be validated, you are empowered to make a positive impact on others' lives. 

You are worthy.